Clutter
During the past week, I spent time visiting a dear friend at an assisted-living facility in Atlanta. It was great to see her so happy among her newfound friends at the residence. The trips down memory lane and laughs were many and prompted me to ask if they found it refreshing to have a lot of the “clutter” out of their lives now that they had substituted a much simpler living environment for their former homes. To my amazement the answer was a resounding “Yes!” I’m sure each of them misses “home” in a variety of ways, but it’s equally clear that the group cherishes the simplicity of its current living arrangements. Each managed to keep a special memento here and there from the past, but they wouldn’t trade the “less is more” living that they’re experiencing today.
You can learn a lot by spending time with those who are entering the twilight phase of life. If you listen carefully, you’ll note that most of them put health at the top of their priority list alongside their relationships with family and friends. Material things don’t have near the importance they had in earlier stages of their lives. What a great life lesson for each of us as we continue to look for ways to eliminate the “clutter” in our own lives.
“Out of clutter, find simplicity. From discord, find harmony. In the middle of difficulty, lies opportunity.”
--Albert Einstein
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Wednesday, March 26, 2008
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
OZ
OZ
For more than a year, the Wizard of Oz has been on my mind. That wonderful movie has endured for almost seventy years, probably because it has an ageless audience. You can rent it, catch it on TV, or Google oodles of information about the movie. That’s a big improvement over the situation forty years ago when whoever had the best TV in the area invited friends over on the one Sunday night per year that it was shown on the tube.
Today I have a very different view of that amazing movie whose many “life lessons” were overshadowed by our frantic fixation on keeping an eye out for the wicked witch. The scarecrow, tin woodsman and the cowardly lion all seemed to be searching for something they felt was lacking in their own lives. But in the end, when they finally catch up to the great Oz, they discover that each of them already has everything needed to lead a great life. All Oz did was make them “conscious.”
I believe that this holds true in daily life for us. So often we get caught up in what we don’t have when we should be turning our focus toward what we do have. Every day we should take that imaginary trip to Oz and confirm the many blessings within us. We all have wonderful things inside of us, and the sky is the limit on what we can do with our lives.
“You, my friend, are a victim of disorganized thinking. You are under the unfortunate impression that just because you run away you have no courage; you're confusing courage with wisdom.”
--Wizard of Oz to the Cowardly Lion
For more than a year, the Wizard of Oz has been on my mind. That wonderful movie has endured for almost seventy years, probably because it has an ageless audience. You can rent it, catch it on TV, or Google oodles of information about the movie. That’s a big improvement over the situation forty years ago when whoever had the best TV in the area invited friends over on the one Sunday night per year that it was shown on the tube.
Today I have a very different view of that amazing movie whose many “life lessons” were overshadowed by our frantic fixation on keeping an eye out for the wicked witch. The scarecrow, tin woodsman and the cowardly lion all seemed to be searching for something they felt was lacking in their own lives. But in the end, when they finally catch up to the great Oz, they discover that each of them already has everything needed to lead a great life. All Oz did was make them “conscious.”
I believe that this holds true in daily life for us. So often we get caught up in what we don’t have when we should be turning our focus toward what we do have. Every day we should take that imaginary trip to Oz and confirm the many blessings within us. We all have wonderful things inside of us, and the sky is the limit on what we can do with our lives.
“You, my friend, are a victim of disorganized thinking. You are under the unfortunate impression that just because you run away you have no courage; you're confusing courage with wisdom.”
--Wizard of Oz to the Cowardly Lion
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Tuesday, March 4, 2008
Heart Space
Heart SpaceOur vision of our heart is one of a finite space. Yet one of life’s mysteries is that your heart space seems to have infinite potential. When you take on the challenge of exploring that possibility, the rewards of the journey will be many. You’ll find that all of the events in your life--good and bad, high and low--have the capacity to expand your heart space each and every day.
When your heart feels small or somewhat hardened by a setback in your life, it’s a good idea to look at these events as an opportunity to enlarge your heart space. You can usually make this happen by getting back to a place “within” that is peaceful and uplifting. Taking a walk in nature, watching a baby sleep, helping the needy, or just holding a pet can take you back to a place where your heart sings.
Each of us has an opportunity to make a difference in ourselves, thereby making a difference in the world in which we live. If we just make a conscious effort each day to increase our “heart space” ever so slightly, we’ll be in awe of just how much the world around us will change. Just imagine what the world would become if each of us followed this path.
“The spirit of harmony can only survive if each of us remembers, when bitterness and self interest seem to prevail, that we share a common destiny.”
—Barbara Jordan (1936-1996)
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Tuesday, February 26, 2008
Collective Energy
Collective Energy Ruth and I just returned from the most incredible conference we’ve ever attended. The annual meeting for young women affected by breast cancer was held last week in Jacksonville, Florida. The most valuable lesson I took away from it was the power of “collective positive energy” amongst these women and their caregivers. The one word that comes to my mind is…WOW!
All of these women are in the dance of life with breast cancer. We met women of all ages in all phases of BC working toward a common goal--wellness. Collectively they shared their stories and encouraged one another to realize that “this too shall pass.” Breast cancer is just a part of the journey and was never intended to be the whole focus of one’s life. It can, if you allow it to, provide you with an opportunity to move on to a whole new--and better--quality of life.
If Ruth and I touched a chord with even a tenth of the people that made an impact on our lives over those three days, we are blessed. Every journey story we heard was uplifting, and each woman touched our hearts. We thank you for allowing us to be a part of your collective energy. We look forward to hearing more about your journey in the days ahead, living beyond the breast cancer path.
The New Friends of TYJ
A special “thank you” to Margaret, Michele, Jane, Laura, Jessica, Amy, Jane, Jennifer, Wendy, Sharon, Tiffany, Nicole, Bethany, Angela, Lisa, Judy, Andrea, Carla, Melody, Pat, Sandra and Bill. Many blessings to Kristine and Ishiuan.
All of these women are in the dance of life with breast cancer. We met women of all ages in all phases of BC working toward a common goal--wellness. Collectively they shared their stories and encouraged one another to realize that “this too shall pass.” Breast cancer is just a part of the journey and was never intended to be the whole focus of one’s life. It can, if you allow it to, provide you with an opportunity to move on to a whole new--and better--quality of life.
If Ruth and I touched a chord with even a tenth of the people that made an impact on our lives over those three days, we are blessed. Every journey story we heard was uplifting, and each woman touched our hearts. We thank you for allowing us to be a part of your collective energy. We look forward to hearing more about your journey in the days ahead, living beyond the breast cancer path.
The New Friends of TYJ
A special “thank you” to Margaret, Michele, Jane, Laura, Jessica, Amy, Jane, Jennifer, Wendy, Sharon, Tiffany, Nicole, Bethany, Angela, Lisa, Judy, Andrea, Carla, Melody, Pat, Sandra and Bill. Many blessings to Kristine and Ishiuan.
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Tuesday, February 19, 2008
It's All Good
It’s all good
A friend, who is a weekly traveler, called recently so that we could update one another on our lives. I think we’d all agree that in the past few years air travel has become a lot more stressful due to heightened security, delays and cancellations, baggage foul-ups, overbooked flights and a host of other problems that try our patience.
I asked my friend how she deals with these challenges, bearing in mind that she has virtually no control over any aspect of it. She replied that at any given moment you can look around and find a ‘life reminder’ that makes you realize that the travel setback you’re experiencing is a temporary one that will pass. Whenever she finds herself in line with fifty other passengers, scrambling to get to her next destination, she looks around and invariably finds a lesson. Just last week it was a young man who had to manage the situation from a wheelchair. A few weeks earlier it was an older couple that rarely traveled, trying desperately to find their way home from a missed connecting flight. She added that it’s never hard to find a soldier leaving for another tour or trying to get back to friends and family.
My friend’s ‘life reminders’ are a wonderful lesson for your journey. No matter what the circumstances in your day the blessings are all around you. A better frame of mind is within sight or just a thought away.
Note to Self
Change the way you look at things and notice how all things change--usually for the better.
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A friend, who is a weekly traveler, called recently so that we could update one another on our lives. I think we’d all agree that in the past few years air travel has become a lot more stressful due to heightened security, delays and cancellations, baggage foul-ups, overbooked flights and a host of other problems that try our patience.
I asked my friend how she deals with these challenges, bearing in mind that she has virtually no control over any aspect of it. She replied that at any given moment you can look around and find a ‘life reminder’ that makes you realize that the travel setback you’re experiencing is a temporary one that will pass. Whenever she finds herself in line with fifty other passengers, scrambling to get to her next destination, she looks around and invariably finds a lesson. Just last week it was a young man who had to manage the situation from a wheelchair. A few weeks earlier it was an older couple that rarely traveled, trying desperately to find their way home from a missed connecting flight. She added that it’s never hard to find a soldier leaving for another tour or trying to get back to friends and family.
My friend’s ‘life reminders’ are a wonderful lesson for your journey. No matter what the circumstances in your day the blessings are all around you. A better frame of mind is within sight or just a thought away.
Note to Self
Change the way you look at things and notice how all things change--usually for the better.
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Tuesday, February 12, 2008
Mid Life?
Midlife?
My niece texted me from college yesterday to let me know that three of her sorority sisters had been in a terrible accident. All three girls died in the accident. This tragedy happened on a Sunday afternoon as the two cars were traveling side by side down the freeway. The car in the right lane tried to merge left ahead of the girls, and though there was no contact between the vehicles, the girls lost control while trying to avoid hitting the merging car. Not only were these girls my niece’s sorority sisters, they were also my sorority sisters in Kappa Delta, albeit ages apart.
This shocking event made me really think about a recent article I wrote on midlife joy vs. midlife crisis. In the article, I was questioning what the midlife age is and why we associate it with crises instead of noting it as a wonderful time in our lives. It’s hard to realize that midlife for these girls was probably age 10 or 11. These types of life events remind me regularly that we never actually know when we are in midlife. The only thing we know for certain is this moment.
For the great majority of us, college life was largely a period of friendships and accomplishments that have left us with cherished memories. I’m sure the Kappa Deltas at Georgia Southern will always remember these girls, our sisters, and will be encouraged by this tragic event to carry the value of everyday moments into the rest of their lives. I have no doubt that this is what these young women would have wanted us to do.
In Memory of Melissa, Jessica and Jamie.
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My niece texted me from college yesterday to let me know that three of her sorority sisters had been in a terrible accident. All three girls died in the accident. This tragedy happened on a Sunday afternoon as the two cars were traveling side by side down the freeway. The car in the right lane tried to merge left ahead of the girls, and though there was no contact between the vehicles, the girls lost control while trying to avoid hitting the merging car. Not only were these girls my niece’s sorority sisters, they were also my sorority sisters in Kappa Delta, albeit ages apart.
This shocking event made me really think about a recent article I wrote on midlife joy vs. midlife crisis. In the article, I was questioning what the midlife age is and why we associate it with crises instead of noting it as a wonderful time in our lives. It’s hard to realize that midlife for these girls was probably age 10 or 11. These types of life events remind me regularly that we never actually know when we are in midlife. The only thing we know for certain is this moment.
For the great majority of us, college life was largely a period of friendships and accomplishments that have left us with cherished memories. I’m sure the Kappa Deltas at Georgia Southern will always remember these girls, our sisters, and will be encouraged by this tragic event to carry the value of everyday moments into the rest of their lives. I have no doubt that this is what these young women would have wanted us to do.
In Memory of Melissa, Jessica and Jamie.
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Tuesday, February 5, 2008
The Zero Degree Theory
The Zero Degree Theory
If there is one thing that I know with absolute certainty, it’s that you are currently experiencing the Zero Degree Theory regardless of your age. This theory guarantees that at any given time in your life you’re dealing with a challenge in some form or other. These challenges vary in impact and intensity from a major illness, career change, or serious relationship issues to the more trivial like a math exam, weight-loss program or even just a bad hair day. Sometimes the bumps in the road are small and at other times they look insurmountable. I believe with all my heart that the “tool kit” you need to work through any life challenge is and has always been within you. The tools are accessible at all times and are just a thought away if you need them. This kit contains some of the most powerful tools in the world: inspiration, courage, love and serenity, to name just a few.
I’ll never forget the day I heard the words “You have cancer.” I fell to the ground crying and proceeded to have a pity party for about two hours, inviting family and friends to join in. Then it all sank in; I needed to take control of my life and not let cancer make any decisions for me. I was sure I possessed all the tools necessary to get through this part of my life’s journey. I had the strength and courage within to find my way back to healthy happy living. And that’s just what I did.
There will be many tests and trials on your journey. Every day you’ll have discussions with yourself questioning your own ability to cope with what is going on in your life. Be patient and look within for the answers. They’re all there inside your heart.
“There will never be another now, I’ll make the most of today. There will never be another me-I’ll make the most of myself.” –R.Schuller
Note to Self
Give yourself permission to know there is a natural order to all the days and events in your life. It’s up to me to make the most of myself no matter what comes my way.
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